The Avid Bruxist Fixes Her Stitches, Part the Third

My third Fix arrived, and I would’ve been happy, except I had worn my Frye flats all day, so my pinkie toes were balls o’ burnin’ flame. (Seriously, what do I do about this? I sprinkled anti-chafing powder on my feet about five times throughout the day. Am I wearing the wrong size or something? Size 7s commit foot-murder on me, but I flop around in 7 1/2s like an 8-year-old who’s raided her mom’s closet. I’m committed to finding something I can wear other than flip-flops, but Jesus.)

I opened the box and tore apart the tissue paper. (One thing I’ll say for Stitch Fix is they do it up with the packaging—make it feel like an event.) First thing out of the stack was this little number:

IMG_5930
Moni geo print blouse from 41Hawthorn

I heard a tiny tick as I lifted it up. On the tile by my feet was one of those brass-looking “buttons”. I figured it was just an extra, you know, like they put in a tiny ziploc on the tag, so you can sew the spare on if one comes off. Because you’re definitely a seamstress.

WHY DO THEY EVEN DO THAT? Everybody knows you’re not gonna sew that button on. Everybody knows you’re gonna put it in a drawer until you move, and then it’ll go in a box labeled Random Crap, which you’ll shove into the attic at your next place, thinking you’ll get back to it at some point. But Some Point never comes. In fact, you move that box six more times over the years, and then when you break your hip, and your ungrateful kids move you to a nursing home, and they dig through six Random Crap boxes looking for swag, they wonder why the fuck you kept an assortment of random buttons and those magnets for ambulance-chasing lawyers that you peel off phone books before you recycle them.

Well, turns out it wasn’t a spare button. It was one of the buttons from the sleeve, and two more of them fell off as I was trying on the shirt. They weren’t sewn on, just pasted, and clearly not that well.

Though the fit didn’t do anything for me—kinda made me look pregnant—I liked the print and maybe would’ve kept it, but hell if I’m gonna hot-glue-gun buttons onto a brand new shirt. Not my job. It went back.

Between the fading pants of the first Fix, and this button-sloughing top, I’m a bit concerned about the quality of items that Stitch Fix selects.

Next up, more skinny pants:

IMG_5931
Giovanni straight leg jean in brown from Level 99

I liked the chocolate color, but these pants were really clingy. I know, they’re skinny jeans—they’re supposed to cling—but they didn’t do anything for my shape. No lifting or supporting in key areas. The look was less slim fit and more defective sausage casing. Sent ’em back.

Moving along:

IMG_5933
Hilson pleat detail blouse from Papermoon

This filmy tank did not flatter—kinda made me look pregnant. And besides, I already own a hot pink tank top that kinda makes me look pregnant. Bye bye.

One of the nice features of Stitch Fix is you can write notes to your stylists, so last time I had written something like:

My friend Kate, who knows about these things, says I should try to incorporate some ‘statement jewelry’. Not that I know what that means, but she has a pair of earrings that are 2-inch white owls, so maybe that? I don’t do bracelets but can work on wearing earrings, necklaces, barrettes, scarves, and belts.

And they sent me these:

IMG_5932
Carmelita twisted wire hoop earrings from Bay to Baubles

To their credit, they probably wouldn’t have made me look pregnant, but they’re not statement jewelry. They’re, at best, crappy mall kiosk jewelry. Back they went.

Was it to be a complete bust?! Was I going to send the whole enchilada back?!

No, once again, a dress came to the rescue:

IMG_5960
Black and white Katana V-Neck Dress from London Times; pinkie-toe shredding Frye flats; wrist brace with thumb spica, for sexiness

Goddammit with the dresses though. Would my poor, poor inner thighs survive?

WELL, on the recommendation of a couple readers, I had ordered three pairs of Bandelettes—lacy, garter-like whoozeewhatsits—that are supposed to preclude chafing… and they did! Rubbery strips on the inside keep them in place, so though the lace pilled a bit, I ended the day with nary a hot spot. (And if my thighs weren’t 28″ in circumference and riddled with cellulite, they’d probably be sexy.)

And for #ThrowbackThursday: The stuff bucket I purchased 20 months ago is dying a painful death. Or at least the handles are.

IMG_5936

I wonder if Stitch Fix does purses…

Stay tuned for future Fixes!

And if you want to try Stitch Fix yourself, please use this link because they’ll give me a $25 credit, and in return I’ll give you an internet high-five or smooch, your choice. 

______________________

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19 thoughts on “The Avid Bruxist Fixes Her Stitches, Part the Third”

  1. Hey Amy, did you know that pregnancy can actually make your feet get wider? Yeah, among other fun things, your muscles and tendons relax, and your feet carrying that extra weight spread out, and like so many other parts of the female body, often they do not go back to your original shape after you deliver. So you may well be a size 7, but a size 7 WIDE. As am I. I shop for my shoes on Zappos; you can filter so you just see Wides. Or you can search for wide women’s shoes online in general. Anyway, I have never been able to just buy shoes off the rack. One thing that helps when a shoe almost fits: moleskin. Not real skins of moles, of course. This pink “flesh-colored” felty stuff with a sticky backing, sold in drugstores in the foot-care aisle. Cut it to the right size and stick on your pinkies, OR, stick to the inside of your shoe. Helps with friction. Carry extra to reapply if it comes loose during the day. And by the way, YOU LOOK FABULOUS!!!! Love, D.

  2. They have no show socks that are made out of nylon that work well. I buy them in nude and black colors, so depending on the flats I am wearing I can match. I got mine at Kohls.

  3. I actually have that grommeted (is that a word?) top in black from StitchFix and wear it all the time. You seriously had to have gotten a defective one because I’ve worn/washed mine a ton with no issues!
    As for your shoe rubbing issue, I have two suggestions:
    1. They make a body glide for runners/athletes that you can get in a deodorant stick looking thing. That may solve your problem.
    2. I have had this issue and painted that New Skin liquid bandaid stuff on and it worked great.

  4. When I first started teaching, I asked the veteran teachers if there existed a shoe that could actually be worn all day while standing. They all sang the graces of the Dansko clog, which is also favored by medical professionals who are on their feet all day. They are quite pricey, but they last forever and are the only shoes I can wear when I know that I will be teaching a complete lesson seven times in one day. (https://www.dansko.com/Womens/Footwear/Styles/Clogs)

    As for the stuff bucket, I’ve come to learn that if I spend around $100 for a bucket that is genuine leather, I can carry it for a minimum of 18 months straight before it dies. So it’s kinda like buying 3 buckets that last 6 months each. 1/2 dozen vs. 6, I guess :D

    zz

  5. Hi Amy, I found your blog by google image searching that Katana v-neck dress…I just received it and wanted to see how others were wearing it. It looks great on you! Looks like we’ve gotten many of the same items from SF. I got that orange shirt a few months ago. I don’t love it, but I kept it anyway. I didn’t have those button issues, though. I hope SF makes that right for you!

  6. Tip for you – I use Band Aid Friction Blister Block stick when I wear dresses or skirts where the thighs rub. Try it you will love it ;)
    Band-Aid Friction Blister Block Stick
    from Band-Aid

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