Today I arm-wrestled the boys in my first period class. Only one of them beat me. (Yes, they’re 12 years old; what’s your point?) The one that beat me is hella strong—at least three inches taller than me and wide as a high school football player. We might actually have a 21 Jump Street situation on our hands.
In related news, what is wrong with me?
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Three years ago, I started a separate Facebook page for my teacher alter-ego and shook my head at kids these days.
Two years ago, I was trying to come to terms with the fact that the Universe didn’t want me to make any money. The Universe still doesn’t want me to make any money. I’m starting to think maybe this teaching thing is not where the big bucks are. Jobs where I’ll make more money and still have at least 10 weeks off per year, go! (Nota bene: U.S. Congress is out. [See: this blog.])
I rediscovered a year ago that I can’t have Girl Scout Cookies in my house. I also rediscovered that same exact thing two weeks ago. I imagine I’ll rediscover it every year until they put me in the goddamn ground.
Happy Retrobruxist Friday, y’all.