Road Trip Soundtrack, Part 1

I will sell it. on the corner. in order to avoid driving I-95 anywhere between DC and Boston, so on my trip south—sans Dad :( —I took a wide sweeping swing west down I-81 and Route 29.

I pretty quickly grew sick of my podcasts and turned to scanning through local radio stations, which is always a joy. Nothing’s better than when WARM 103.3 Today’s Hits & Yesterday’s Favorites busts out “Take On Me” by A-ha.

By the way, I just learned he’s saying “I’ll be gone in a day or two“, which makes more sense than “I’ll be gone doo doot doo doooooooo“. Also, “steadily learning the piper’s OK” (whew, I was concerned about him) is actually “slowly learning that life is OK”. Also too, “you’re all the things I’ve got to remember”. I always understood that’s what the line was, but I never got until Saturday that it’s the fucking loveliest song lyric ever.

You’re all the things I’ve got to remember.

Wow.

Onward! Why are my local radio stations so lame and everywhere else’s so hilarious and/or awesome?

Since I was trundling through Pennsylvania, you might guess Track 1 of our Road Trip Soundtrack: Stanley Pulaski and His Orchestra’s “May June July Polka”, a very jaunty little number. I can’t find a video for it, but it’s available on Polka Party Volume 2 on eBay. (Don’t make a mistake and order Polka Party Volume 1 or you’ll be disappointed!)

Polka Party

Track 2:

Aw, YEAH. Ramble ON, man.

Reminded me of my days riding shotgun in the old Sube, my brother at the helm. All his Led Zeppelin cassettes case-less and kicking about in my footwell, the writing worn off—we had no way of knowing what album it was until we threw it in the tape deck. And then we’d just ROCK OUT. And then we’d go to school.

Track 3:

“Just What I Needed” is in the top ten greatest pop songs ever. Debate me.

Track 4:

Fun fact: My sister is a Bee Gees fan. Like, not ironically or anything. Loathes the Beach Boys, but genuinely enjoys the Bee Gees.

Next installment I hit the Top 40 stations!

I Did a Good, Good Thing, But I Fucked It Up, As Per Uzh

I made soup!

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On the first bite, I was like, “I would ask this soup to prom.” The second bite was also good, but with each subsequent bite, it tasted less like soup and more like dessert.

That didn’t stop me from eating two bowls, but I wondered how I might cut the sweetness next time. I tappity-typed out a comment on the webpage, and just before I hit Post Comment, I thought to myself, “Self, you’re doing great. I don’t want to take anything away from the amazing progress you’ve made in the kitchen. But. When something doesn’t turn out quite right—I’m not saying always, I’m not saying always—just a lot of the time, or all the times I can remember right now, it’s because you’ve made a misstep.”

I considered where I might have gone wrong, and the only sweet thing in there was coconut milk, so I looked at the can.

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Guess what was made of coconut “juice”, sugar, polysorbate 60, a variety of diglycerides, propylene glycol alginate (that sounds healthy), sorbitan monostearate (good for preventing tennis elbow, I’ve heard), guar gum, and locust bean gum. Two kinds of gum. Both guar and locust bean.

Goya, you cabrón. Fucking trickster.