I got my pie-hole looked at the other day. You know, scraped, flossed, buffed. My teeth look good, the dentist said, except for those chips and hairline cracks in my incisors and the divots in a handful of molars from my spectacular bruxercising.
I asked once again how much a mouthguard would be. A real one, not the $12 jobby I got at Target.
Five hundred bucks.
We’ve never checked with my insurance company whether they’d cover it because my dentist has always said it wouldn’t unless I have gum disease, but I ask him to send a “determination” this time anyway.
He was right. I got the letter. They’ll pay $0 toward a mouthguard for me.
I don’t get it. I’m actively grinding my teeth out of my head, and they won’t pay, but somebody with gingivitis gets half a thou. Maybe I should stop brushing and flossing, and in a year or two, I’ll get what I need.