I mightily offended a friend of mine yesterday.
This friend is a born-again Christian, but she also has a snarky wit. (I’m making those things sound like mutually exclusive qualities, aren’t I? Well….) Moreover, she has an easy laugh, even about difficult topics. We’ve had any number of theological discussions. She has always been understanding and generous in the face of my doubts.
When the topic of acceptance of homosexuality came up, her argument was that she couldn’t “pick and choose which parts of the Bible to believe in”. So I posted this internet meme that’s been making the rounds on Facebook and tagged her. I thought she’d find it hilarious. I certainly did. My favorite part:
Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians?
My friend accused me of trying to persuade her not to believe in God, being disrespectful, and antagonizing her.
(…Naturally, I freaked out that SOMEBODY WAS MAD AT ME—ACK! and apologized profusely. She accepted my apology, and then a funny thing happened.
I got pissed. A swirling rage gurgled up inside of me, and I had no idea what was generating it. So I sat on it for a day. Here’s what I came up with:
I was really offended—oh, the irony!—by her accusations. I mean, I was upset that she could even interpret my action in that way. She clearly thought that I had malicious intent, and I was taken aback that a friend of mine could believe that of me.
At that point, I had some very middle-schooly thoughts.)
My point was—my POINT was, we do pick and choose which parts of the Bible to believe in. Lots of people smarter than me have said this before, but the Bible was written centuries after the death of Jesus Christ (a dude I believe existed, a dude I believe was totally righteous, a dude I believe wasn’t the son of God—sorry—but you can believe that! Rock on ’til the break o’ dawn!) by folks who may have been inspired by their Creator but who were also products of their era and geographical setting.
Thus, we might-could extrapolate the messages presented in the Bible and apply them as appropriate in our own time and place.
Anyway.
I really did think she would laugh.