A Quest

Navigating her trusty barque through the Sea of Overwhelm, our protagonist finds her gaze diverted to the shore by a gentle beast who appears to be in distress.

Gentle Beast

“What ho?” she cries, and pulls alongside the struggling animal. “It appears thou hast a mighty thirst, young one. It is nigh 100 degrees of the thermometer today.”

The creature lowers itself to the turf and flops upon its side, exposing a pestilence-ridden underbelly.

“Oh woe, little dude, the mites that plague thee! And there is no flesh to cover thy ribs! Here, have a stale biscuit that has been in my satchel for perhaps weeks now, I don’t remember.”

The wretched thing accepts the morsel with gratitude. Thump goes the mutt’s tail against the ground. Crunch, crunch. Thump, thump.

“Well, I cannot forsake thee here. Should you attempt to cross this turbulent ocean, some Ford Squarerigger or Chrysler Schooner will surely run thee over. Nay, you must climb aboard my Subaru Barque, and I will carry thee to safety.”

The beast hesitates. Our heroine attempts to lure him into the vessel—alas, he is too fearful. She finally hoists him up in her arms and deposits him on the thwart. They set sail.

“Beware the Dragon of Cynicism to the east—see it there! It rears its head to spout negatory comments! Listen.”

“You will never find a home for that varmint!”

“You dastardly naysayer! I shall slay thee with my Harpoon of Hope!”

The varmint looks skeptical.

The duo arrive at their destination, and the beast is offered a plate of chopped fowl. He devours it and gulps from a flagon of sweet water. Our valiant protagonist is exhausted. She sends her messenger to the shire’s Lord of the Beasts. The officer sends word back that he will accept this animal temporarily, but should it not find a permanent residence, he will banish the wee one to the Isle of Lost Souls….

Our heroine coaxes the beast toward his fate, through the Forest of Abject Guilt.

“I would like to keep thee as a companion, friend, but I have two mutts already that I tend. Plus, I’m trying to sell a house and buy a house and I just started a new job and broke up with my boyfriend and my grandma had a stroke yesterday. No can do, buddy.”

The Lord of the Beasts meets the pair on the trail and whisks the animal into his carriage.

“Remember my words, Avid Bruxist…you must find a home for this creature.” A tear slips down our heroine’s cheek.

Then another. And pretty soon she’s bawling like a little bitch.

[Anybody want a dog?]

1,591 thoughts on “A Quest”

  1. I do accept as true with all the concepts you have offered to your post.
    They’re really convincing and can definitely work.
    Nonetheless, the posts are very brief for beginners. May you please lengthen them a bit from next time?
    Thank you for the post.

  2. With havin so much content do you ever run into any problems of
    plagorism or copyright infringement? My site has a lot
    of exclusive content I’ve either authored myself or outsourced but it looks like a lot of it is popping it up all
    over the internet without my agreement. Do you know any techniques
    to help protect against content from being ripped off?
    I’d certainly appreciate it.

  3. all the time i used to read smaller articles that as well clear their motive,
    and that is also happening with this piece of writing which I
    am reading here.

  4. ?? ?????????? ??????????? ??????? ??? ??????? ? ???????????? ??????? ??????? ???????
    ???????, ??????? ??????????? ???????????
    ????? Palfinger. ?? ????? ????? ??
    ??????? ??? ??????????? ??? ????????????? ?????? ?????? ???????????? —
    ?? ?????? ??????????? ?? ??????? ????? ? ?????????.

    ??????? ??????????? ????????? ??? Palfinger ? ?? ??????
    ???????? «???-?» ???????????????? ?? ????????? ???????????? ????????????? ??? ??????????, ????????????? Palfinger,
    ??????????? ? ?????? ???????????.

    ? ????? ???????? ????????????:

    • ???????? ??? ??? Palfinger ???? ??????????? — ??
    ???????????? ??????? ?? ??????????? ??????????????????? ?????????.

    • ????????????? ??? ???????? ????????? Palfinger PK, Palfinger INMAN,
    Palfinger IT ? ?????? ?????????? ?????.

    • ?????? ??? ??????????? Palfinger — ?????????????, ??????????????, ?????? ? ?????? ???????? ??????????????
    ???????.
    • ???????????? ???????? ??? ?????? Palfinger — ??????,
    ???????, ??????-?????????? ??????????, ??????????, ????????? ? ????????.

    ?? ????????, ??? ?????? ?????? ??????? ????? ???? ???????????, ??????? ?????????? ?????????????? ?????? ??????? ??? ?????????? ?????? Palfinger.

    ???? ??????????? ??????? ??? ????????? ???????????????? ??????????? ????????, ???? ?? Palfinger 15500, Palfinger 150 IT, Palfinger INMAN
    150 ??? ????? ?????? ???????????.

    ???????????? ?????? ? ????
    • ???????????? ?????????. ?? ???????? ???????? ? ????????-??????????????, ??? ??????????? ??????? ????????
    ? ??????????? ???? ?????????????.
    ??????? ???????? — ?????? ????????????????? ??????,
    ??????????????? ?????????
    ?????????????.
    • ??????? ?? ??????. ? ??????? ?????? ???? ??????? ???????,
    ??????? ?????????????? ???????? ??? Palfinger, ??? ????????? ??? ??????????
    ????????? ?????? ??? ???????????
    ????????.
    • ???????? ?? ???? ??????. ?? ???????????? ??????? ? ????????
    ???????? ????????? ??? Palfinger ? ????? ??????
    ??, ????? ?? ????? ?????????? ???????????? ????????????????? ????? ???????.

    • ??????????? ?????????. ????
    ??????? ???????? ?????? ?????????????????? ??? ?? ????? ???????? ???????,
    ????????? ? ???????????? ????????? ??? ??? Palfinger ? ?????? ?????.

    • 30 ??? ?????. ??? «???-?» ?????
    ????? ??? ??????????????
    ???? ?????? ? ????? ???????????? ???????????, ??? ?????????????? ?????????? ?????????? ? ?????????? ??????????? ????????.

    ?????? ???????? ????
    ???? ?? ????? palfinger ??????????? ???? ??, ??????????? ? ???.
    ?? ?????????? ???????? ???????
    ?????????????? ??? ??? ????????? ???????????, ??? ? ??? ??????? ??????????.
    ? ??? ?? ??????? ?????? Palfinger ?????????,
    ?????????, ???? ??? ????? ????????????? ??
    ???????????? ?????. ?? ????? ??????? ??????? ? ????????? ??????? ??????? ?????? ??????????? ??????? ? ??????????.

    ??? ???? ???? ???????
    ???? ???????? ???????? ??? ?????????? Palfinger,
    ????????????? ?? ????? ?????, SANY ? ??????
    ???????? ???????????.
    ?? ?????????? ?????? ??? ???????? ?????????,
    ???????????, ????????????? ? ?????? ???????????, ????????????
    ? ?????????????, ???????-???????????? ?????????, ????????? ? ??????????????.

    ??? ??????? ??????
    ????? ?????? ???????? Palfinger
    ??? ???????? ????????????, ?????????? ?????????
    ? ???? ?? ????????, ????????? ?????? ????? ???? ??? ???????? ??? ???? ? ??????.
    ?? ?????????? ?????????? ??? ??????, ????????
    ??????????? ??????, ????????? ?????????
    ? ?????????? ???????? ? ?????????? ?????.

    ?????? ??????? ? ????? ???????!

    ? ???? ?? ????????? ?? ?????? ????????, ? ???????? ?????????? ? ????????????? ?????? ????????????.
    ?? ???????? ???????? ???? ?????? ????????????? Palfinger, ?????? ? ???????????,
    ??????????? ?? ????????????? ?????? ????
    ? ????? ??????? ????????.
    ???????? ??? ???? — ????? ?? ??????? ?????????? ?????????????? Palfinger, ??????,
    ??????? ?? ?????? ? ?????? ???????? ??????????.
    ???????? ???????? ? ????????, ????? ?????? ???? ? ????? ???????
    ? ???????????????.
    ??? «???-?» — ??? ???????? ?????????
    ???????????? ?????????
    ??? Palfinger ? ?????? ???????????. ???????, ??????, ??????????? —
    ?? ?????? ?? ?????!

  5. Hello superb blog! Does running a blog like this take a large amount of work?

    I’ve absolutely no knowledge of computer programming however I was hoping to start my
    own blog soon. Anyhow, should you have any suggestions or techniques for
    new blog owners please share. I know this is
    off topic but I simply wanted to ask. Cheers!

  6. Hey There. I found your blog using msn. This is an extremely well written article.

    I will make sure to bookmark it and come back to read more of your useful information. Thanks for the post.
    I will certainly return.

  7. I am really loving the theme/design of your website. Do you ever run into any browser compatibility
    issues? A small number of my blog readers have complained about my blog
    not working correctly in Explorer but looks great in Safari.
    Do you have any solutions to help fix this issue?

  8. Excellentt goopds frokm you, man. I hawve underxtand
    ypur stuff previous to andd you’re jhst tooo magnificent.
    I realoly like hat you’ve acauired here, cerrtainly likee whatt youu aare sayiing aand the waay
    iin whch yyou say it. You make iit enterrtaining and yoou
    stiol tke care off tto keep itt smart. I can nnot waiot too red mucch moire ffom you.

    This iis actually a tremenjdous site. xnxx

  9. Hi there! I realize this is somewhat off-topic but I had to ask.

    Does operating a well-established blog like yours take a lot of work?
    I am completely new to running a blog but I do
    write in my journal every day. I’d like
    to start a blog so I can share my experience and views online.
    Please let me know if you have any suggestions or tips for brand new
    aspiring blog owners. Thankyou!

  10. My coder is trying to convince me to move to .net from
    PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses.
    But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using WordPress on several websites for about a year and am nervous
    about switching to another platform. I have heard good things about blogengine.net.
    Is there a way I can transfer all my wordpress content into it?
    Any kind of help would be really appreciated!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *