Well Played!

Yesterday, my sister and I were walking around the park near my house.  She had her three young’ns, I my two hounds.  The ground was really slushy, but for the first time in days, the sun shone in the sky, and I felt comfortable walking in my yoga pants and hoodie.  A few folks had the same idea as we did:  kids scampered up and down the play structure and squealed; a woman speed-walked on the paved loop; and three skateboarding high-schoolers stood yakking in front of the water fountains.

I was only somewhat aware of the teens, until I was loading the dogs up into the back of my car.  I had my back to them when I heard one of them say, “Look at that FAT ass.”  I turned to see him staring at me, smiling, with bright eyes.  Another of the boys took off on his skateboard, yelling, “My DICK wants to be in THAT.”

So here’s what I did.  I shook my head, gave them a withering look, and said, “Pathetic.”

Wait, no.  I walked over and excoriated them with Shakespearean insults.

No, no.  That’s not it.  I beckoned sexily to the first speaker, only to knee him in the balls, grab him by the hair, and smash his skull against the picnic table.

Oh, wait.  No, I remember.  I didn’t say a thing, maneuvered my body around my car such that I was out of their line of sight, went home, and binge ate.  That’s right.  That’s what I did.

Sexy Grammar

Another word about prepositions, because I know that’s what really drives the traffic to my site:

Why do we Americans insist on adding one where there needs be none?  I mean, I understand a preposition’s use with verbs like get, make, or take.  But it baffles me when people say things like, “Let’s reflect back on our week.”  Doesn’t reflect already mean ‘look back’?  Can’t you just say, “Let’s reflect on our week”?

Same with refer.  Just refer.  Don’t ‘refer back’.

Or another one, ‘continue on’.  How else would you continue but on?