Joined Match.com today. OKCupid was not cutting it.
Sometimes, just for shits and giggles, I like to play Mad Libs with the dudes’ profiles.
“You want somebody that: treats you like a [dolphin], [swiffers] you, has a money paying [monkey], won’t embarrass [your cat], [screams] charge, makes you [speak Arabic] and will listen to your [rotator cuffs] but not fix them.”
Dear Ms. Scott,
You are the best teacher in
the world! And you ALWAYS will. I love
how you teach us. I always understand
what you mean because you explain it
to use [sic] in a way that you would under-
stand if you were a kid our age
learning it. Also I love the activities
that we do! So when we have a test
about it we will remember the activit-
y and then we will remember the
things, which leads to a good grade!
I can’t wait to see Violet! But I
can wait with the EOG’s. I’ll always
remember you!
Your student,
Nadia
On Saturday, I went to The Weave to pick up something for lunch and there, on the hot bar, was a dish of emerald greens. I didn’t know what they were but was surprised when I looked at the tag: collards. The only way I’ve seen collard greens is brown and wilted, with a big hunka fatback in ’em. So I’d never tried them. Well, I was still skeptical so I took only a couple. After I tasted them, I almost went back in and got more. So good.
Anyways, I stopped by a roadside produce stand yesterday, and there they were, big and leafy and intimidating. But I bought some, looked up a recipe online, and cooked those collard greens. I’m not sure I should get a badge on my Authentic Southerner vest for this because the recipe was from epicurious and included no pork-procured fats, but I’ll have you know I MADE A SLAMMING COLLARD GREEN.
