The Relationship I’m in Already

You’ns may recall a while back when a different Amy altogether took the blog wheel for a minute. Well, I’m on vacation so I’m relinquishing the keys once again for my enlightenment and yours. This post made me have lots of thoughts and feelings, which I’ll share when I’m not sunbathing, but I’m interested in hearing from you all as well.

Without further ado, I give you today’s guest-blogger, the inimitable amy a (and no, that’s not my pseudonym—she’s an entirely different human being).

There are moments in Television History at large, and then there are those in my own Personal Viewing History.  Some are one in the same, like Michael Jackson moonwalking on live TV for the first time, the very last episode of The Sopranos, or Bill Clinton’s speech at the DNC this year. Others are exclusive to either category, and for the purposes of this guest entry, I’m going to fast-forward this to an episode of a certain Millionaire Matchmaker Reality Show Which I Never Watch But For Some Reason Happened to See at the Right Moment.

On this particular episode, a very wealthy divorced-with-kids fellow who exuded that teeter-totter imbalance of sweet and insecure yet not douchey was hoping to find His Match with the help of the Millionaire Matchmaker, who set him up with a down-to-earth-yet-beautiful single gal. They had a lovely date around a vineyard and horses, and just when I was about to gag, they shared an Actual Moment. Maybe it’s because they both seemed like genuine people, or maybe it’s because I secretly wanted to give this a chance as much as they did, but I can remember their exchange hitting me like a ton of bricks. He asked her somethingoranother, and she responded with the sentiment that she felt happiest and was a better person in a relationship. And that, my friends, is when the proverbial coffee cup fell out of my hand onto the carpet, and my proverbial everything bagel slipped off its saucer, landing cream cheese-first onto the coffee-soaked carpet.

Because the truth is, and was, although I desperately and unabashedly have loved the men I have been in relationships with, and several others with whom, let’s be honest, I haven’t quite exactly been in a quid-pro-quo relationship, I cannot say that I’ve ever been for any length of time happiest and a better person IN a relationship than OUT of one.

It occurred to me in that moment that many, or maybe most, folks over the age of 15 lived lives quite different than I.  Those couples I see on Facebook who have been together since high school and seem actually very happy, those who are remarried after divorce or the death of a spouse, those who were once married but now never want to be again but seem to constantly be in a relationship with Someone, those who have never been married but are in a monogamous relationship with Someone for a certain length of time…all of them, coupled, preferring to be in a relationship with another. I would assume that for most, it makes them happier and better people being in that partnership.

I thought I wanted that. And yet, the relationships I drew to me, even the “committed” ones, were not that. I have always felt more centered and alive on my own. It’s even more so the older I get, as I come more into my own person. It’s interesting to realize that I am at an age when many women are involved in the growth and change of their relationships with not only their husbands but their children as well, while I am only responsible for the one with myself. It can be kind of lonely, not because I don’t have those types of relationships, but because I find myself being unable to relate firsthand to my siblings and some of my friends on those levels.

I don’t know if I will ever be that comfortable sharing a life with someone.  I’ve always entered into relationships with the best of intentions, always thinking maybe this is The One. I thought I wanted a Partnership. And maybe I do.  But I also really like being single. And not dating. The pressure as each year has passed in my 30’s to Find Him has been at times not at all fun, but exhausting, humiliating, and unhealthy. (And here’s the thing, I don’t like just casual dating for fun, either, because you can’t do that for very long without it feeling ridiculous.) I’ve actually been at parties where upon hearing I’m single, someone said “Oh, I’m so sorry” and MEANT IT. I’ve been at family reunions where the only other adult who wasn’t married or engaged was my Special Needs cousin. I’ve been at weddings where I’ve been SCOWLED at for not catching the damn bouquet (I wasn’t even trying to catch it, thankyouverymuch).

I have walked through the valley of the shadow of Where I Thought I’d Be In Life, and I have fought those demons. I continue to do so, as I know everyone does from time to time.  I have discovered the glorious revelation that not only is it OK that I’m not partnered, that it’s also really OK that I don’t make it a priority in my life. I may never have that Great Relationship, but it never happening is no longer a fear of mine. If it happens, I welcome the addition of it, but I am truly happy in the relationship I’m in already.

 

6 thoughts on “The Relationship I’m in Already”

  1. Hi Amy,
    I just wanted to say I love this blog so much. You are hilarious and I can totally relate to a lot of the things you post about. (My co-worker and I are currently trying online dating and find your re-caps so funny and true to our own experiences). I know you did not write this post but it has resonated so strongly with me. Most of the time I am more than happy being single, but it is really just the expectations of others and the thoughts of where I thought I would be at this point that really bother and haunt me. I know in your most recent post you mentioned that you are having a tough week – hang in there. From what I have read (no – I am not an internet stalker – just a bored at work blog reader) you have so many friends and family that are fun and love you. Hope your week brightens up!

  2. Thiis iis a really goodd tip especially to those new to the blogosphere.
    Simole but vwry accurtate information… Maany tbanks
    for sharing thhis one. A mst read article!

  3. Thanx for the effort, keep up the good work Great work, I am going to start a small Blog Engine course work using your site I hope you enjoy blogging with the popular BlogEngine.net.Thethoughts you express are really awesome. Hope you will right some more posts.

  4. Best SARMS PCT Supplements: Complete Guide To Post Cycle Therapy

    Best SARMs PCT Supplements: Complete Guide To Post Cycle Therapy

    Post cycle therapy (PCT) is a crucial component of using SARMs (Selective Androgen Receptor Modulators).
    It helps restore your body’s natural hormone production and prevents
    potential negative effects from the use of these supplements.
    In this guide, we’ll dive into everything you need to know about
    PCT for SARMs, including why it’s important, how to recognize signs of testosterone suppression, and which SARMs
    require a PCT supplement.

    Here’s Why Understanding SARMs PCT Is So Important

    SARMs are designed to mimic the effects of anabolic steroids without some of the harsh side effects.
    However, they can still suppress your body’s own hormone production,
    particularly testosterone. Without proper PCT, this suppression can lead to hormonal imbalances, decreased libido, and even testicular atrophy over time.
    PCT ensures that your body restarts its natural hormone production, allowing you to return to a natural state of hormonal equilibrium.

    How To Spot The Signs Of Testosterone Suppression

    Testosterone suppression symptoms can vary depending on the individual and the duration of SARM use.

    Common signs include:

    Decreased libido or sexual function

    Fatigue or low energy levels

    Reduced muscle mass despite proper training

    Acidic pH in semen (may indicate lowered sperm quality)

    Increased body fat gain, especially in areas like the face and upper body

    If you notice these symptoms after stopping
    SARM use, it’s a strong indicator that your body needs support with PCT.

    These Are The SARMs That Need Post Cycle Therapy

    SOME SARMs are more likely to cause testosterone suppression than others.
    These include:

    – **Ostarine (MK-2866)**: One of the most commonly used SARMs, ostarine has a high affinity for the androgen receptor and can suppress natural testosterone production.
    – **Ligandrol (LG-MAX or LGH-397):** Known for its strong suppression effects, ligandrol can lead
    to significant drops in testosterone levels.
    – **Andarine (S-4):** Another SARM with robust suppression capabilities,
    particularly at higher doses.
    – **Yk-11 and Myostatin inhibitors:** These can also suppress testosterone production and may require a longer PCT
    period.

    On the other hand, some SARMs like **Cardarine (GW-501516)** are generally considered milder in terms
    of hormone suppression and may not require as intense a PCT.

    However, it’s always better to err on the side of caution and
    include a PCT supplement for any SARM use.

    These Are The SARMs That Don’t Require A PCT Supplement

    SOME SARMs are less likely to cause significant testosterone suppression, making them safer in terms of PCT requirements.
    These include:
    – **Cardarine (GW-501516):** While it can still suppress hormones
    slightly, the effects are usually less pronounced compared to other SARMs.

    – **Andarine (S-4):** At lower doses, andarine may have minimal impact on testosterone suppression. Higher doses may require
    PCT.

    However, even with these, it’s important
    to monitor for any signs of suppression and consider a
    PCT supplement if needed.

    Will Ostarine Require PCT?

    Ostarine is one of the SARMs that typically requires post-cycle
    therapy. After a cycle, you should follow a comprehensive PCT to support your body’s natural testosterone
    recovery. This usually involves taking supplements like Testosterone Enanthate or Testosterone Cypionate, along with anti-estrogenic agents
    like Anastrozole or Tamoxifen.

    Difference Between SERMs And Aromatase Inhibitors

    SERMs (selective estrogen receptor modulators)
    and aromatase inhibitors are often used in PCT. Here’s the key difference:
    – **SERMs**: Block estrogen receptors, preventing estrogen from binding
    to them. They also increase testosterone production by inhibiting the enzyme 5-alpha reductase.

    – **Aromatase Inhibitors (AIs)**: Prevent the conversion of androgens to
    estrogens in the body, which can help reduce estrogen-related side
    effects and support natural hormone production.

    Are SARMs Safer Than Anabolic Steroids?

    SARMs are generally considered safer than anabolic steroids due to their lower androgenic activity and
    reduced suppression of natural hormone production.
    However, they can still have significant side effects if used improperly or without a proper
    PCT.

    Top 4 Most Common PCT For SARMs And Steroids

    Here are the most common PCT supplements for SARMs and anabolic steroids:
    1. **Testosterone Enanthate/Cypionate:** The gold standard for
    PCT, these esters help restore natural testosterone levels.

    2. **Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT):** In some cases,
    users may opt for HRT with Testosterone and/or Estrogen to maintain hormone
    balance.
    3. **Arimidex (Anastrozole):** An AI that helps manage estrogen-related side effects and supports natural hormone recovery.

    4. **Clomiphene Citrate or Tamoxifen:** These are often used as
    anti-estrogenic agents during PCT to mitigate
    estrogen dominance.

    Best Natural Alternative: Rebirth PCT

    If you’re looking for a natural alternative to traditional PCT supplements, you
    can consider using compounds like Rebirth PCT, which contains a blend
    of natural ingredients designed to support hormone health.

    It’s an excellent option for those who prefer a more natural approach or are sensitive
    to synthetic supplements.

    PCT Cycle Length & Dosing

    The duration and dosage of your PCT will depend on the SARM
    you used and its potential for testosterone suppression.
    For example:
    – **Ostarine (MK-2866):** Typically requires a PCT of 4-8 weeks at a low dose (2-5mg/day) followed by
    a longer cycle.
    – **Andarine (S-4):** May require a shorter PCT if used at lower doses.

    – **Ligandrol (LG-MAX):** Requires a more extensive PCT due
    to its strong suppression effects.

    Always follow the instructions provided by your supplier or research thoroughly
    before starting any PCT.

    Where To Buy High-Quality PCT For SARMs

    To ensure you’re getting a safe and effective PCT, it’s important
    to purchase from reputable suppliers. Look for
    companies with a proven track record of providing high-quality
    supplements. Some popular choices include:
    – **Prime Nutrition
    – **Hydrolytic Biochemics
    – **PCT Supplement Pro

    These brands are known for their quality and purity, ensuring you’re getting a product that
    will effectively support your PCT needs.

    Post navigation

    Sign Up For Our Newsletters

    Subscribe to our e-mail newsletter to receive updates on the latest fitness trends and supplement reviews.

    More Stories From This Author

    Discover more articles by this author and stay updated
    with the latest in fitness, health, and supplementation.

    Share on Mastodon

    Join our community on Mastodon for more in-depth discussions and updates about
    fitness and supplement culture.

    my webpage; classification of Steroids

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *