Stitch Fixing, Part 10, or Ladies Ladies Please

YOUR FASHION-CHALLENGED AVID BRUXIST! SHE IS BACK! WITH ANOTHER FIX! (See part 9 here, and follow the links for previous posts.)

Before we get into all the clothes-horsing, let’s address some other aspects of my attempt not to devolve into Frumpmom:

(1) Thumbs down: I’ve been negligent in the makeup department. I use tinted chapstick most days, but that’s about the extent of it. I just can’t seem to haul my carcass out of bed any earlier than is absolutely necessary in order to paint myself up for a bunch of 11-year-olds. (I know, I know, I should do it for myself. How do I start giving a shit about makeup?)

(2) Thumbs up: Jeff wanted to give me lazy curls, and I said OK, sure. And will you look at this?!

IMG_9157

Of course, I’ve been able to replicate this look exactly zero-point-zero times since the day he cut it, but for the one day, I looked like I had just stepped out of a salon. Which I had.

On to the Fix!

Let’s start with what I thought would be a slam-dunk but turned out to be a brick at the buzzer. #marchmadness #basketballmetaphors #highfive

When I saw “41 Hawthorn Renesme faux wrap dress” on the packing list, I was like, “Well, I’ll be keeping at least one thing for sure,” because even though I hate wearing dresses, wrap dresses always look good on me.

Then I put it on and was corn-fused.

KAAAAAAAAATE!

IMG_9251

Kate, as usual, articulated the problem:

IMG_9252

She’s generalizing, of course, with “nobody”. Buffalo Bill wanted nothing more than to wear a skin dress. #putthefuckinglotioninthebasket

Next up, a pair of good jeans (FINALLY), which are hard to see in this girls’ bathroom photo, but just take my word for it, they’re uniform dark wash (no whiskers) and huggy in the right places.

Also, shirt from previous fix, key lanyard statement piece, coffee cup statement piece, and pencil statement piece
Sandy bootcut jeans from level 99. Also, shirt from Fix 6, key lanyard statement piece, five-dollar Shoe Carnival sunglasses, and utilitarian flip-flops.

There were two shirts in this Fix, and though I liked the color of the first one, I honestly had no idea whether either of them was any good in terms of shape, fit, or style.

IMG_9253
Top, Skies Are Blue Donavon crochet-detail knit top. Bottom, Rilo button-up blouse from Collective Concepts.

Good thing there’s Kate!

IMG_9254

IMG_9255

That Kate, always making sure the ladies get their due. And if you asked, as I did, “Da fuq is a placket?”, I googled it–it’s an opening in a garment, like a collar, cuff, or waistline.

She was right, btw. Here’s a better pic of the green:

IMG_9193

Sent the hiddy pattern, boobflappy, collarless placket one back.

You know what’s coming, don’t you? The statement piece!

IMG_9099
Zad Adrianna Circle Bib Necklace

“Yes or no?” I asked Kate.

She was like, “Do YOU like it?”

We all know that’s beside the point, but yeah, I thought I did like it. She said I could keep it, so I kept it.

Hey, please use this link to try Stitch Fix for yourself because if you do that, they’ll give me a $25 credit, and I’ll keep posting these silly blogs about it. (I make zero dollars on my blogs. Keep me in couture, readers!)

Stay tuned for future Fixes!

______________________

Like Avid Bruxist on Facebook.
Follow Avid Bruxist on Twitter.

Read my other stuff at Fat CrossFitter and Baby Happy Pants.

 

6 thoughts on “Stitch Fixing, Part 10, or Ladies Ladies Please”

  1. Can I borrow Kate? I am impressed with your efforts. I need to make a better attempt at looking like a human and not a frumpy parent.

  2. Thank you a lot for sharing this with all of us you really understand what you are speaking approximately! Bookmarked. Kindly additionally seek advice from my site =). We may have a link change arrangement between us!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *