Your fashion-challenged Avid Bruxist—she is back with another (mis)adventure! (For previous posts, scroll to the bottom and click the Fayshun tag.)
You get a double-dip again because I am perpetually weeks behind on everything that isn’t absolutely essential, and a few things that are.
Also, sorry about the fuzzy first pic. I think my dad* was messing with the thermostat, so the AC was on, and my computer camera had, like, frost on it.
*If you’re just joining me, my dad lives with me, not the other way around.
I was psyched about seeing dark jeans in the box, but motherfffffffff.
I shared my frustration with Kate, natch.
Kate asked how noticeable the whiskers were.
I thought the stylists would review your file and shit before they shopped for you, and I think they do to a certain extent, but it occurred to me that, like most Americans, they’re probably paid too little to do too much, and they skim it, rather than pore over it, so I’m not taking chances anymore. I’m including this note with every future Fix:
I’m interested–what does your yes/no list look like?
Very occasionally I throw caution to the wind and pull the tags off before I check with Kate:
Kate: trying to improve my body image since 2011.
Not trying to improve my body image? This shirt:
Get fucked, tricky backs!
I was lost on the next piece. It somehow both hugged my curves and made me feel mannish? Fortunately, Kate was there to break it down for me.
I miss those orange pants.
Stitch Fix sent me a skirt, which made me realize, I don’t own any. Like not one. So I thought I’d keep this one if it was OK with Kate.
And they are sending me petites, but I guess I’m even petiter than most.
OK, we’re done with the first box. Are you ready for the second one, or do you need a break? Take a break! Get a snack. Hydrate. Come back when you’re ready.
You’re back! Yay, I missed you.
I didn’t even ask for a purse, but high-five, Stitch Fix, because the straps are wearing out on my old one.
Then, pants. I need some better lighting in my room. These are not black.
Now, when will I have time to get them hemmed…? Lemme check.
Looks like 2032.
<creates Google calendar event>
<tucks hems under and crosses fingers>
I kinda liked the next piece:
But I had a concern.
I ended up keeping it because the Buy 5 discount meant it was cheap and besides now I can do this bit:
Then we have a non-wow-but-OK-for-work blouse:
Get fucked, tricky backs!
Last but not least, or maybe last and least, a non-wow-but-OK-for-work cardigan:
That’s the Fixes.
In other fashion news, I ordered two pairs of flats from Zappos, and goddammit. I was thisclose to moving to a year-round-sandals climate because the only closed shoes that don’t shred my feet are sneakers and Timberlands, and neither really goes with slacks.
But I just went to DSW and tried on a couple pairs of flats that felt like butter going on. And that’s when I decided I would never buy another shoe that doesn’t feel like butter going on, the first time. None of this maybe they’ll stretch shit. I’ve never successfully broken in a pair of shoes. They either feel good immediately or they never will.
Anyhow, they’re not The World’s Cutest,
but as a 43-year-old exhausted fat single mom and middle school teacher, my threshold for pain-in-the-pursuit-of-cuteness has become narrow–almost imperceptible to the naked eye, in fact. And besides, they’re Cute Enough.
(The Atlantic recently published an article called “Why Women’s Shoes Are So Painful” that made me feel seen. The author basically narrated my experience. Of course, I made the mistake of reading the Facebook comments, and there were a bunch of women who were like, “Oh really? I’ve worn heels and flats my whole career, and I’ve never had any problems.” I resisted the urge to write, “WELL, CONGRATUFUCKINLATIONS ON YOUR PERFECT HOOVES, SHARON.”)
There you have it. I have another Fix coming in a week or two, and also I was thinking about hitting up Lane Bryant again? I haven’t been there since 2009, but I put on a pair of their pants the other day (yes, the ones I bought in 2009)–totally frayed and a victim of my trademark Swingline sartorial skillz–but very stretchy and flattering.
Anyhow, I hope to scratch together another post soon.
Hey, if you want to try Stitch Fix for yourself, please use this link. They’ll give me a $25 credit, and I’ll keep writing these silly blogs.
______________________
Become my patron on Patreon, and for as little as $1/month, see these posts early and get access to other super-secret posts!
Like Avid Bruxist on Facebook.
Follow Avid Bruxist on Twitter.
Read my other stuff at Fat CrossFitter and Baby Happy Pants.
Hello! I could have sworn I’ve been to this blog before
but after checking through some of the post I realized it’s new to me.
Anyways, I’m definitely glad I found it and I’ll be book-marking and checking back often!
It’s really very difficult in this busy life
to listen news on TV, therefore I just use web for that reason, and obtain the newest news.
There is certainly a lot to learn about
this topic. I love all the points you have made.
I’m amazed, I have to admit. Seldom do I encounter a blog that’s both educative and amusing, and let me tell you,
you’ve hit the nail on the head. The issue is something which too
few men and women are speaking intelligently about. I am very happy I stumbled across this during my search for something
regarding this.
Your mode of describing the whole thing in this post is genuinely pleasant, all
be able to without difficulty know it, Thanks a lot.
Appreciation to my father who stated to me about this blog, this blog is really awesome.
Aw, this was an exceptionally good post. Taking the time and actual
effort to create a good article… but what can I
say… I procrastinate a lot and never seem to get nearly
anything done.
Znáte n?jaké metody, které by pomohly omezit krádeže obsahu? Rozhodn? bych ocenil
Generally I do not read post on blogs, however I wish to say
that this write-up very compelled me to try
and do so! Your writing style has been surprised me.
Thanks, very nice article.
I was suggested this blog by my cousin. I am not sure whether this post is written by him as nobody else know such
detailed about my problem. You’re incredible!
Thanks!
I am really enjoying the theme/design of your website.
Do you ever run into any browser compatibility issues?
A handful of my blog readers have complained about my site not working correctly in Explorer but looks great in Chrome.
Do you have any advice to help fix this problem?
A person necessarily lend a hand to make severely articles I
would state. That is the very first time I frequented
your web page and to this point? I surprised with the research you
made to make this actual publish amazing.
Great task!
You are so awesome! I don’t believe I’ve read through a single thing like this before.
So good to find another person with unique thoughts on this topic.
Seriously.. many thanks for starting this up. This web site is one thing that is needed on the web, someone with some originality!
I do accept as true with all the ideas you’ve presented in your post.
They are really convincing and can definitely work.
Still, the posts are too quick for newbies. May just you
please lengthen them a bit from subsequent time?
Thank you for the post.
We absolutely love your blog and find the majority of your post’s to
be precisely what I’m looking for. can you offer guest writers
to write content in your case? I wouldn’t mind writing a post or elaborating on a few
of the subjects you write related to here. Again, awesome weblog!
Great blog here! Also your website loads up fast! What web host are you using?
Can I get your affiliate link to your host? I wish my web site loaded up as quickly as yours lol
A fascinating discussion is worth comment. I do think that you need to write more about this issue, it might not be a taboo matter
but typically people do not talk about such subjects.
To the next! All the best!!
Hi there! This blog post could not be written any better!
Reading through this post reminds me of my previous roommate!
He constantly kept preaching about this. I am going to forward this article to
him. Pretty sure he’s going to have a great read. I appreciate you for
sharing!
Hi there, I log on to your new stuff on a regular basis.
Your story-telling style is awesome, keep it up!
It’s an amazing paragraph designed for all the web viewers;
they will take benefit from it I am sure.
I just like the valuable info you provide for your articles.
I will bookmark your weblog and check again right here frequently.
I’m quite certain I will be informed many new stuff proper here!
Good luck for the following!
pokra?ujte v p?kné práci, kolegové.|Když máte tolik obsahu a ?lánk?, d?láte to?
Hi there! Quick question that’s totally off topic.
Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly? My website looks weird when browsing
from my iphone 4. I’m trying to find a theme or plugin that
might be able to resolve this problem. If you have any suggestions, please share.
With thanks!
Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as
though you relied on the video to make your point.
You obviously know what youre talking about, why throw away your intelligence
on just posting videos to your site when you could be
giving us something informative to read?
Very rapidly this website will be famous amid all blogging users,
due to it’s good articles
Hello colleagues, good article and pleasant arguments commented at this place, I am genuinely enjoying
by these.
If you want to improve your knowledge only keep visiting this
web page and be updated with the latest information posted here.
If some one wishes expert view on the topic of blogging then i suggest him/her to
go to see this web site, Keep up the pleasant work.
Thanks very interesting blog!
This is the perfect web site for everyone who wishes to understand this topic.
You know a whole lot its almost hard to argue with you (not that I really would want to…HaHa).
You definitely put a fresh spin on a topic which has been discussed for a long time.
Wonderful stuff, just wonderful!
fortsæt det gode arbejde stipendiater. Med at have så meget indhold og artikler gør du det
Hi i am kavin, its my first time to commenting anywhere, when i read this post i thought
i could also create comment due to this brilliant article.