Amy’s Fashion (Mis)Adventures: Tricky Backs & Carol Burnett

Your fashion-challenged Avid Bruxist—she is back with another (mis)adventure! (For previous posts, scroll to the bottom and click the Fayshun tag.)

You get a double-dip again because I am perpetually weeks behind on everything that isn’t absolutely essential, and a few things that are.

Also, sorry about the fuzzy first pic. I think my dad* was messing with the thermostat, so the AC was on, and my computer camera had, like, frost on it.

*If you’re just joining me, my dad lives with me, not the other way around.

I was psyched about seeing dark jeans in the box, but motherfffffffff.

Mavi Alanis skinny jean $88

I shared my frustration with Kate, natch.

Kate asked how noticeable the whiskers were.

I thought the stylists would review your file and shit before they shopped for you, and I think they do to a certain extent, but it occurred to me that, like most Americans, they’re probably paid too little to do too much, and they skim it, rather than pore over it, so I’m not taking chances anymore. I’m including this note with every future Fix:

I’m interested–what does your yes/no list look like?

Very occasionally I throw caution to the wind and pull the tags off before I check with Kate:

Olive & Oak Maryanne striped pullover $58

Kate: trying to improve my body image since 2011.

Not trying to improve my body image? This shirt:

Papermoon Patrise 3/4 sleeve open back knit $38

Get fucked, tricky backs!

I was lost on the next piece. It somehow both hugged my curves and made me feel mannish? Fortunately, Kate was there to break it down for me.

Abbey Rose Vanda zipper detail knit top $38

I miss those orange pants.

Stitch Fix sent me a skirt, which made me realize, I don’t own any. Like not one. So I thought I’d keep this one if it was OK with Kate.

Gilli Willet knit skirt $48

And they are sending me petites, but I guess I’m even petiter than most.

OK, we’re done with the first box. Are you ready for the second one, or do you need a break? Take a break! Get a snack. Hydrate. Come back when you’re ready.

You’re back! Yay, I missed you.

I didn’t even ask for a purse, but high-five, Stitch Fix, because the straps are wearing out on my old one.

Urban Expressions Robi classic work tote $48

Then, pants. I need some better lighting in my room. These are not black.

Liverpool Renee straight leg pant $88

Now, when will I have time to get them hemmed…? Lemme check.

Looks like 2032.

<creates Google calendar event>

<tucks hems under and crosses fingers>

I kinda liked the next piece:

Fun2Fun Maley pleated detail top $48

But I had a concern.

I ended up keeping it because the Buy 5 discount meant it was cheap and besides now I can do this bit:

Then we have a non-wow-but-OK-for-work blouse:

Brina & Em Lemmy v-neck top $38

Get fucked, tricky backs!

Last but not least, or maybe last and least, a non-wow-but-OK-for-work cardigan:

August Mist Hadlee brushed knit cardigan $44

That’s the Fixes.

In other fashion news, I ordered two pairs of flats from Zappos, and goddammit. I was thisclose to moving to a year-round-sandals climate because the only closed shoes that don’t shred my feet are sneakers and Timberlands, and neither really goes with slacks.

But I just went to DSW and tried on a couple pairs of flats that felt like butter going on. And that’s when I decided I would never buy another shoe that doesn’t feel like butter going on, the first time. None of this maybe they’ll stretch shit. I’ve never successfully broken in a pair of shoes. They either feel good immediately or they never will.

Anyhow, they’re not The World’s Cutest,

but as a 43-year-old exhausted fat single mom and middle school teacher, my threshold for pain-in-the-pursuit-of-cuteness has become narrow–almost imperceptible to the naked eye, in fact. And besides, they’re Cute Enough.

(The Atlantic recently published an article called “Why Women’s Shoes Are So Painful” that made me feel seen. The author basically narrated my experience. Of course, I made the mistake of reading the Facebook comments, and there were a bunch of women who were like, “Oh really? I’ve worn heels and flats my whole career, and I’ve never had any problems.” I resisted the urge to write, “WELL, CONGRATUFUCKINLATIONS ON YOUR PERFECT HOOVES, SHARON.”)

There you have it. I have another Fix coming in a week or two, and also I was thinking about hitting up Lane Bryant again? I haven’t been there since 2009, but I put on a pair of their pants the other day (yes, the ones I bought in 2009)–totally frayed and a victim of my trademark Swingline sartorial skillz–but very stretchy and flattering.

Anyhow, I hope to scratch together another post soon.

Hey, if you want to try Stitch Fix for yourself, please use this link. They’ll give me a $25 credit, and I’ll keep writing these silly blogs.

______________________

Become my patron on Patreon, and for as little as $1/month, see these posts early and get access to other super-secret posts!

Like Avid Bruxist on Facebook.
Follow Avid Bruxist on Twitter.

Read my other stuff at Fat CrossFitter and Baby Happy Pants.

690 thoughts on “Amy’s Fashion (Mis)Adventures: Tricky Backs & Carol Burnett”

  2. I’ve been reading various topics on DeFi lately, and your post stands out due
    to its valuable insights. As I see it, decentralized exchanges like
    this platform have become essential for secure and efficient trading.
    I particularly appreciated your point about AMM strategies.

    A common concern for many users is efficiently utilizing liquidity.
    I’m curious about your perspective on tools for traders like those discussed can benefit
    small-volume traders as well as larger entities. If you
    have any resources, I’d love to check them out!

    Appreciate the helpful post. Looking forward to seeing more from you.

    Reply

  4. I have been following DeFi trends, and this platform is a fantastic resource for comprehensive insights.
    Your approach to gathering cross-chain data sets
    a high standard.

    A point I really appreciate is the detailed breakdown of protocols.

    It helps users to track growth in a clear and efficient way.
    Will you be adding custom filters for yield farming strategies in the future?

    By the way, the recent updates are a welcome addition. I’d
    love to hear your perspective on what trends you predict for TVL growth.

    Kudos for maintaining such valuable data for the community!

    Reply

  5. I’ve been reading various topics on DeFi lately, and your post stands out due to its valuable insights.
    Personally, decentralized exchanges like this platform have become essential
    for reliable and cost-effective trading. I particularly found interesting your point about AMM strategies.

    A common concern for many users is minimizing slippage.
    I’m curious about your perspective on tools for traders mentioned can empower small-volume traders as
    well as larger entities. If you’ve any additional tips, I’d
    love to check them out!

    Thanks for the great content. Looking forward to reading more from you.

    Reply

  6. Pretty great post. I simply stumbled upon your weblog and wished to mention that I’ve truly enjoyed browsing your weblog posts.
    After all I’ll be subscribing to your rss feed and I’m hoping you write again soon!

    my web-site: ????? 77bet

    Reply

  8. Awesome things here. I am very glad to see your post.
    Thanks a lot and I am having a look forward to touch you. Will you kindly drop me a e-mail?

    Reply

  10. I blog frequently and I genuinely appreciate your content.
    This great article has really peaked my interest. I will book mark your site and keep checking for new details about once per week.
    I subscribed to your RSS feed too.

    my site – ??????? Huc99

    Reply

  12. Howdy! This is kind of off topic but I need some help from an established blog.
    Is it very difficult to set up your own blog? I’m not
    very techincal but I can figure things out pretty quick.
    I’m thinking about setting up my own but I’m not
    sure where to begin. Do you have any points or suggestions?
    With thanks

    my webpage Rescue truck

    Reply

  20. Greetings I am so excited I found your website, I really found you by mistake, while I
    was looking on Digg for something else, Anyways I am here now and would just like to say thanks a lot for a incredible post and a
    all round thrilling blog (I also love the theme/design), I
    don’t have time to read it all at the minute but I have book-marked it and also included your RSS feeds, so when I have
    time I will be back to read much more, Please do keep up the awesome b.

    Look at my web page: ??????? 77bet

    Reply

  21. Hi, i think that i saw you visited my site so i came to “return the favor”.I’m attempting to find things to enhance my web site!I suppose its ok to use some of your ideas!!

    Reply

  25. When someone writes an article he/she retains
    the thought of a user in his/her brain that how
    a user can be aware of it. So that’s why this article is outstdanding.
    Thanks!

    Feel free to visit my homepage; ????? bk8

    Reply

  44. Good day! Do you know if they make any plugins to help with Search Engine Optimization? I’m trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but I’m not seeing very good gains. If you know of any please share. Kudos!

    Reply

  46. Hello There. I found your weblog the use of msn. That is
    a very neatly written article. I’ll be sure to bookmark it and come back to learn extra of your useful
    info. Thank you for the post. I will certainly comeback.

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *