Your fashion-challenged Avid Bruxist, she is back with another Fix! (If you want to read previous Stitch Fix/fashion posts, scroll to the bottom and click the Fayshun tag.)
If you’re just joining us, I am bad at fashion, and my friend Kate is good at fashion, so she is my stylist. Her duties include coaching me on what to keep and what to send back to Stitch Fix every month. I pay her for her services in love. But not romantic love because she’s already married.
Let’s do this! First piece:
That’s right, I’m here for all your 2011 Portlandia references. #hepcat
It’s kind of sheer so I should probably wear a cami under it. That will just depend on how much I give a shit that day, I guess. But yay! First piece is a keeper!
Then, oh no!
An obvious no at a fraction of the NINETY-EIGHT DOLLAR price–WHAT?!, but then came a bit of textual confusion.
My feelings were, it was a shirt.
The thing about Stitch Fix prices is they’re always high for the quality, but you have to factor in that somebody else is shopping for you, which for me is worth a lot lot lot, so $32 for this shirt–I was like wellallrightfine.
Next we have an accessory:
I didn’t keep it because it was just a thing, and a $34 one at that, but it did remind me that accessories exist. I hadn’t actually unpacked my jewelry after my move. Nine months ago.
So I did that! I hung up my accessory hanger! Ergo, the Stitch Fix necklace served a purpose.
Last item is (Brian Fellows voice) A DRESSSSSSSSS! That’s right, I’m here for all your 1999 Saturday Night Live references.
I wore it to Kate’s wedding, which was not actually her wedding because she got married 15 months ago up in DC but more like a party to remind everybody she got married. I even wore makeup! The same makeup Kate made me buy… in 2012. I know you’re supposed to throw your makeup out every six months, but if I did that, I’d be throwing away makeup that I used thrice, and that’s not sound economic or environmental policy.
Anyway, that reminded me that I really only know 1.5 makeup lewks–the one she and Meg taught me and I taught you in the days of yore, and then a little red lipstick jobby that I pull out on occasion. I should probably learn some more about makeup. Beauty iz harrrrrrrrrrd, you guys.
If you want to try Stitch Fix for yourself, please use this link. They’ll give me a $25 credit, and I’ll keep writing these silly blogs.
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