Don’t know Tulip? Start here.
Day 1
I come out of the shower to find Tulip chewing up a pair of flip flops that I’ve just bought to replace the flip flops Violet chewed up two years ago. (Yes, I have been wearing them since then.) I snatch the shoe out of her mouth and—I’m not proud of this—I throw it at her. It glances off her foot.
It is mangled. I’m so mad I flop down face-down on my bed and just breathe. It’s only a flip-flop, I say. She didn’t know any better, I say.
Eventually, I get up, but I give her the silent treatment. Though she has always followed me from room to room, she stays on my bedroom floor and looks sheepish.
I last about five minutes before I crawl up next to her and rub my forehead against her neck. She forgives me. Dogs.
Day 2
A woman who has previously adopted a CCB dog wants to meet Tulip, though she has a cat, and I think Tulip might eat a cat.
Day 3
My buddy Phil develops a plan to bomb a bunch of neighborhood listservs with an email about Tulip, including links to her Facebook page and tumblr.
I write and forward him the email, and he implements the plan.
Day 4
Due to the listserv bomb, Tulip gets lots of new Likers on Facebook. Everyone thinks she’s so funny.
She shits on the deck again. Very funny, Tulip.
Day 5
Two different prospects contact me about meeting Tulip. I send them my availability for the weekend, and we set up appointments.
Day 6
Both prospects cancel.
Day 7
somehow, i was not a “like”r of tulip’s facebook page until last night. (shame on me.) but i have to tell you — i spent a great deal of time on her page last night. and that girl is GORGEOUS. and sweet. and funny. and hard working. but, really. GORGEOUS.
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