{"id":7171,"date":"2013-06-07T15:45:36","date_gmt":"2013-06-07T19:45:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/?p=7171"},"modified":"2013-06-07T15:45:36","modified_gmt":"2013-06-07T19:45:36","slug":"retrobruxomgschoolsoutbvvvvvvvvvvt","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2013\/06\/07\/retrobruxomgschoolsoutbvvvvvvvvvvt\/","title":{"rendered":"RetrobruxOMGSchool&#8217;sOutBvvvvvvvvvvt"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>SCHOOL&#8217;S OUT. SCHOOL&#8217;S OUT. SCHOOL&#8217;S OUT.<\/p>\n<p>Also, I QUIT MATCH.COM. Wahooooooooooooooooo!<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ll have to find my man some other way. Thinking I might build a trap.<\/p>\n<p>With all my dating woes, people frequently ask what I&#8217;m looking for in a man, and remarkably (considering how generally wordy I am), I&#8217;ve never been able to put it into words, you know? I mean, I want funny, but funny&#8217;s not enough, as evidenced by a recent two-date sequence. He has to be physically attractive too, but my taste in what&#8217;s physically attractive is (1) not all that conventional (I ain&#8217;t got no problem with bald, and sometimes a big nose just works) and (2) varies widely (lithe rock climber, sure; Viking with a mead gut, also good). He should be smart but not an \u00fcbernerd. Kind but not a pansy. I don&#8217;t know. I DON&#8217;T KNOW.<\/p>\n<p>But then yesterday, I was stopped at a stoplight, and I saw this.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/06\/IMG_5646.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-7172\" alt=\"IMG_5646\" src=\"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/06\/IMG_5646-e1370570041436.jpg\" width=\"450\" height=\"336\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Pretty sure I could be down with any man who says, &#8220;Amy, you and your parts come first.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Thanks, Sport Durst.<\/p>\n<p>**********<\/p>\n<p><strong>Three years<\/strong> ago, I discovered that I was <a href=\"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2010\/06\/01\/cause-effect\/\">NCGS<\/a>. That&#8217;s like <a href=\"http:\/\/www.ncis.navy.mil\/Pages\/publicdefault.aspx\">NCIS<\/a>\u00a0but infinitely less badass.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Two years<\/strong> ago, I was <a href=\"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2011\/06\/02\/unsure-of-everything\/\">unsure of everything<\/a>. Man, things don&#8217;t change much.<\/p>\n<p>Any dude who wants to get with me must be definitively <a href=\"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2012\/06\/05\/chuck-2-0\/\">pro-gay<\/a>, as I learned <strong>a year<\/strong> ago.<\/p>\n<p>Some of the things you may have missed on <a href=\"http:\/\/fatcrossfitter.tumblr.com\/\">Fat CrossFitter<\/a>: I was OK with <a href=\"http:\/\/fatcrossfitter.tumblr.com\/post\/51962958615\/on-scaling-also-my-new-nickname\">scaling<\/a>. Then I <a href=\"http:\/\/fatcrossfitter.tumblr.com\/post\/52271114052\/rx\">wasn&#8217;t<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>Happy Retrobruxist Friday, y&#8217;all.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>SCHOOL&#8217;S OUT. SCHOOL&#8217;S OUT. SCHOOL&#8217;S OUT. Also, I QUIT MATCH.COM. Wahooooooooooooooooo! I&#8217;ll have to find my man some other way. Thinking I might build a trap. With all my dating woes, people frequently ask what I&#8217;m looking for in a man, and remarkably (considering how generally wordy I am), I&#8217;ve never been able to put &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2013\/06\/07\/retrobruxomgschoolsoutbvvvvvvvvvvt\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">RetrobruxOMGSchool&#8217;sOutBvvvvvvvvvvt<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":7172,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[13,5,14,12],"tags":[120],"class_list":["post-7171","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-call-me-crazy","category-dating","category-gluten-freek","category-liftin-heavy-objects-over-ma-head","tag-retrobruxist-friday"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7171","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7171"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7171\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7178,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7171\/revisions\/7178"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/7172"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7171"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7171"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7171"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}