{"id":6242,"date":"2013-01-30T21:37:07","date_gmt":"2013-01-31T02:37:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/?p=6242"},"modified":"2013-03-13T08:28:41","modified_gmt":"2013-03-13T12:28:41","slug":"moar-fayshion","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2013\/01\/30\/moar-fayshion\/","title":{"rendered":"Moar Fayshion"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Screen<\/a><\/p>\n

People liked my orange pants, I guess.<\/p>\n

\"Orange<\/a>
Sweater from Ann Taylor Loft and Gap orange slacks! I was also wearing my tall boots.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"See?<\/a>
See? Tall boots. Also, Redford’s tall boots.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

What a waste though because you couldn’t see them, and they were super-sweaty on my calves. But the only other black shoes I have are Danskos, and I thought Kate the Ginger Menace<\/a> would tsk<\/em> at me if I wore clogs with my sassy orange pants. KATE, YOU’RE IN MY HEAD.<\/p>\n

Other than the squeeziness on my calves, I liked this outfit OK. I’d wear it again.<\/p>\n

I’d definitely wear the next get-up.<\/p>\n

\"IMG_4056\"<\/a>
Dark Gap jeans, top from Banana Republic, and short boots short boots I love my short boots comfy comfy cute cute I love my short boots.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

(Sorry about the shmutz on the mirror. Sixth graders.)<\/p>\n

I love this outfit and will definitely wear the shit out of it… as soon as I get the shirt fixed. I pulled on a stray thread, and the whole hem came out of the back. Bullshit. I’m taking it back to BR, and they’re going to sew it up, or I’ma put a world of hurt on them.<\/p>\n

OK. So. I promised Kate I would wear a skirt once every two weeks (wah!). Well, the school district called a delayed opening on Monday\u00a0because of inclement weather—that meant I’d have to wear the skirt for three fewer hours<\/em> than other days (woohooooooooooo!)—so I went for it.<\/p>\n

Now, I built the outfit around the tall boots. I was really psyched about showing them off. But when I got dressed, I realized the skirt came down to mid-knee, and the boots came up to mid-knee, and the result was that nary a bit o’ leg showed betwixt, aaaaaand it looked like I had prosthetic legs.<\/p>\n

So I switched to my pointy flats.<\/p>\n

\"Uncomfortable.\"<\/a>
Skirt from Banana Republic, old blouse from god-knows-where, and pointy flats from Nine West. You can’t really see the shoes. Wait a minute.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"IMG_4016\"<\/a>
There. I didn’t think the pointy flats, which are greenish gray, looked very good with the black tights, but once I sausage-casing-ed myself with them, fuck if I was going to peel them off and shimmy into a different pair, so there you go.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

[Side note: On our shopping trip, Kate kept trying to get me to buy heels.<\/p>\n

Kate: What about these?<\/em>
\nMe: Those are heels.<\/em>
\nKate: But they’d look so good!<\/em>
\nMe: Kate! I told you<\/strong> I can’t wear heels*!
\nKate: But they’d look so gooooooooooood.
\nMe: Kate! It’s a medical issue<\/strong>! After I wore those\u00a0strappy blue sandals with the wedge heel to Craig and Michelle’s party last summer, my toes were numb until Wednesday<\/strong>. The party was on a Saturday<\/strong>, and I couldn’t feel my feet until Wednesday<\/strong>.<\/em>
\nKate: …What about a kitten heel?<\/em>
\nMe: Bah!<\/em><\/p>\n

*It looks like the tall boots have a heel, but it’s, like, an inch, and besides, they’re Aerosoles, thus they’re pretty cushy. Even so, my toes tingle by the end of the day.]<\/p>\n

Kate wanted me to buy a girdle to wear with this skirt. (Nowadays, people say “Spanx”, but let’s call a spade a spade, shall we?) I felt like I was going above and beyond the call of duty by wearing not only the skirt but the tights too, so<\/p>\n

\"so<\/a>
y’all just get to deal with the fact that I have a belly.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Verdict: I felt totally uncomfortable the entire (albeit shortened) day. Kate said, “You look great! What would we have to do to make you comfortable in this?”<\/p>\n

I said, “Make it into pants.”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

People liked my orange pants, I guess. What a waste though because you couldn’t see them, and they were super-sweaty on my calves. But the only other black shoes I have are Danskos, and I thought Kate the Ginger Menace would tsk at me if I wore clogs with my sassy orange pants. KATE, YOU’RE … Continue reading Moar Fayshion<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6243,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[125,20],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6242","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fayshun","category-first-world-problems"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6242","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=6242"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6242\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6534,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6242\/revisions\/6534"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/6243"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=6242"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=6242"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=6242"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}