{"id":5671,"date":"2012-11-05T15:43:45","date_gmt":"2012-11-05T20:43:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/?p=5671"},"modified":"2012-11-25T14:34:30","modified_gmt":"2012-11-25T19:34:30","slug":"cooking-for-dumbs-2nd-edition","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2012\/11\/05\/cooking-for-dumbs-2nd-edition\/","title":{"rendered":"Cooking for Dumbs: How to Make Lunch"},"content":{"rendered":"

Today you’ll learn how to make All Your Lunches for the Week<\/strong> on Sunday morning.<\/p>\n

Step 1: Go to Whole Foods and buy<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>
one of these guys.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Eighteen bucks, and it comes with<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>
health.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Step 2: In a Pyrex dish with a lid, place<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>
one piece of London broil,<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"\"<\/a>
some green beans,<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"\"<\/a>
and some potatoes.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Cover with lid.<\/p>\n

Step 4: Repeat until all ingredients are distributed. As you do,<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>
check out how bad your dogs want some of that beef<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"\"<\/a>
but they pretend they’re not about to take you out at the knees for it when you give them a stern look.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Step 3: Divide the health<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>
into containers, using the same method above.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Note: Don’t dress the health. Even the morning of<\/em>, because<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>
health doesn’t hold up well under vinaigrette.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n
\"\"<\/a>
Voila! You cooked!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Step 4:\u00a0For Friday’s lunch, you’ll just have to improvise since, while you were cooking,\u00a0you got hungry from all the lesbian dancing<\/a> the previous night and ate one of the portions for breakfast.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Today you’ll learn how to make All Your Lunches for the Week on Sunday morning. Step 1: Go to Whole Foods and buy Eighteen bucks, and it comes with Step 2: In a Pyrex dish with a lid, place Cover with lid. Step 4: Repeat until all ingredients are distributed. As you do, Step 3: … Continue reading Cooking for Dumbs: How to Make Lunch<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15,14],"tags":[86,85,88,87],"class_list":["post-5671","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-cookin","category-gluten-freek","tag-fake-cooking","tag-gluten-free","tag-lunch","tag-whole-foods"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5671","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5671"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5671\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5832,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5671\/revisions\/5832"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5671"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5671"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5671"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}