{"id":233,"date":"2009-11-13T22:50:26","date_gmt":"2009-11-13T22:50:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/?p=233"},"modified":"2010-01-08T21:48:26","modified_gmt":"2010-01-09T02:48:26","slug":"older-sister-younger-brother","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2009\/11\/13\/older-sister-younger-brother\/","title":{"rendered":"Older Sister, Younger Brother"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Me:\u00a0 Sit.\u00a0 Good girl, Violet.\u00a0 <em>(I unhook her leash.\u00a0 She sprints away.)<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 <em>(bucking like a bronco) <\/em>I WANNA GO I WANNA GO I WANNA GO.<\/p>\n<p>Me:\u00a0 Then you need to sit.<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 There I sat NOW CAN I GO.<\/p>\n<p>Me:\u00a0 Nice try.\u00a0 Sit.<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 <em>(sits, trembling) <\/em>Aw man.<em> (I try to unhook his leash.\u00a0 He bolts and nearly chokes himself.) <\/em>OK OK OK.\u00a0 <em>(sits, trembling)<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Me:\u00a0 Good boy.\u00a0 <em>(I unhook his leash.)<\/em> OK.\u00a0 <em>(He sprints away.)<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 VIOLET WAIT UP oh my gosh I&#8217;m running so fast hi Violet did you see how fast I runned?<\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 Ran.<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 Yeah ran.<\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 No.<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 Oh, well I runned really fast wait I gotta poop.\u00a0 <em>(poops, sprints to catch up) <\/em> Hey wanna go this way?<\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 No, I&#8217;m going this way.<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 OK how bout we go the way you&#8217;re going oh wait I gotta poop.<\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 Go poop, then.\u00a0 I don&#8217;t need to hear about it.<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 <em>(poops, sprints to catch up)<\/em> Hey Violet wanna play chase?<\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 Not unless a deer is &#8216;it&#8217;.<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 OK let&#8217;s go find a deer oh wait I gotta poop.<\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 Ugh.<\/p>\n<p>Redford: <em>(poops, sprints to catch up)<\/em> I can run faster than you Violet wanna see here I go!<\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 So?<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 I gotta poop.\u00a0 <em>(poops, sprints to catch up)<\/em> Hey Violet what&#8217;re you smelling?<\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 Something.<\/p>\n<p>Redford:\u00a0 WHAT IS IT can I smell too oh my gosh it SMELLS LIKE POOP AWESOME!\u00a0 <em>(drops and rubs his neck across it)<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Violet:\u00a0 <em>(sigh)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><br \/>\n<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Me:\u00a0 Sit.\u00a0 Good girl, Violet.\u00a0 (I unhook her leash.\u00a0 She sprints away.) Redford:\u00a0 (bucking like a bronco) I WANNA GO I WANNA GO I WANNA GO. Me:\u00a0 Then you need to sit. Redford:\u00a0 There I sat NOW CAN I GO. Me:\u00a0 Nice try.\u00a0 Sit. Redford:\u00a0 (sits, trembling) Aw man. (I try to unhook his leash.\u00a0 &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/2009\/11\/13\/older-sister-younger-brother\/\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Older Sister, Younger Brother<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-233","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-animules","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/233","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=233"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/233\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":443,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/233\/revisions\/443"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=233"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=233"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/avidbruxist.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=233"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}