Ten Dozen of the Least Helpful Observations on Women’s Strength Training

I already put my two cents in the comments on his page, but I present them here for you: one penny plus one penny plus maybe a few more haypennies, on the world’s most ridiculous list of “tips” for women’s strength training by über-glute, Bret Contreras. (He admits that “many aren’t really tips, just observations”. Uh duh.)

11. Women absolutely love it when they perform their first legitimate push-up and chin-up, and many love doing “masculine” things in the gym such as pushing sleds

Guess what else I absolutely love: everything that’s difficult that I work toward and then accomplish. So masculine! Gosh, between getting a Master’s, fostering pit bulls, and walking two marathons, it’s remarkable I haven’t grown a penis.

65. Some women make sexual-sounding grunts when lifting; men grunt but it doesn’t sound sexual

Here we have a classic case of Auditory Hallucinations for the Heterosexual-Heteronormative Male.

55. A small percentage of women possess what I call “Tasmanian devil syndrome,” characterized by a barrel chest with two chicken legs – this is the hardest body type to improve!

Because that body type is wrong—WRONG. If you’re apple-shaped, your genes are WRONG. And hard to improve! (Your body needs to be improved!)

64. Women don’t tend to care as much about science and research – anecdotes are often sufficient for evidence

and

18. Certain female sexual positions might contribute to women possessing good hip mobility and pelvic control (ex: ones that have the woman in a deep squat position, ones that have the woman in a bridge position, ones that have the woman rocking their hips back and forth, etc.)

LOL-ing at this juxtaposition. Studies upon studies, so much of the scientific evidence proving that Reverse Cowgirl helps my front squat.

But it is true that my vagina makes me hate research, so what do I know?

52. Where women store fat varies dramatically between women – typical problematic areas for fat storage are the inner thighs, buttocks, and back of the arms, however some struggle in the lower abdominal and lower back regions too

LOL-ing again. Absolutely no awareness—not even a synapse in the general direction—that “problematic areas for fat storage” is a social/cultural construct.

61. Women sometimes dress very sexy for the gym and are then annoyed when males show interest while they’re training, which on the surface doesn’t make the best of sense.

#rapeculture #victimblaming #fuckyouandthehorseyourodeinon

7. Many women have unhealthy attitudes about their body images

Couldn’t be because some bonehead said they look like a Tasmanian Devil, could it?

56. Most women have well-intentioned male friends who give them horrendous advice pertaining to their goals

No. NO. Like who? Who might do that?! I can’t think of anybody who, for example, would make a list of 120 “tips” for women’s strength training, many of which are misogynistic/moronic.

What complete and utter bullshit—except WAIT.

9. Some women have “coregasms” when training, and the hanging leg raise is the primary culprit (these orgasms usually aren’t welcomed as they’re inconvenient)

Um. Can this be taught? Two birds, you know?

(Unwelcome orgasm? That’s like an undelicious s’more.)