Ask the AB: How to Tip Your Waitress

In this segment of our broadcast, I like to answer questions asked by the audience. Also questions asked by no one, as is the case in this one. This particular post is dedicated to waiters/waitresses/ waitrons/servers/people-who’ll-be-taking-care-of-you-tonight and contains a few brief lessons on how to tip them.

Step 1: Tip them.

That’s right. We live in America. I don’t care if you’re from another country, or your mama raised you thrifty, or in your American subculture “we don’t tip”. Tip the damn waitress.

Maybe you think you don’t need to. Waiting tables is not that hard, right? Well, other than being personable, remembering orders, entering them into a computer, dealing with kitchen staff (which can be a challenge, cain’t it, Margo?), delivering food and drinks, making sure the customers’ needs are met, and being on their feet all night, you’re right. Nothing to it.

Step 2: Tip them 20%. 

That’s right. We live in America. A standard tip is now 20%. If the service is truly shitty, talk to the manager. Otherwise, look at the total on your bill, shift the decimal one place to the left, and then double that amount.

Maybe you think you don’t need to. They get a paycheck after all. Yes. Guess how much the hourly wage for a server is in NC. Two dollars and thirteen cents an hour.

$2.13

Employers are allowed to do that because it’s assumed waitstaff will receive tips. (See Step #1.)

[If at your Sunday brunch you think, “It’s a buffet! They don’t have to do that much!”, remember they still have to be there, and they’re still getting paid $2.13 an hour.]

Step 3: Tip them cash.

I know, I know—we live in America. We like to pay with plastic. Pay the tip in cash.

Maybe you think you don’t need to. But sometimes, when the customers have been drunk and belligerent, and the kitchen has screwed up a couple orders, and the servers have had to bus and reset all their own tables the whole shift because the busboy got busted for having a pound of weed in his Tercel, that wad of cash is the only thing that’ll make them get out of bed and serve your ass again the next day.

There you go. You didn’t ask the Avid Bruxist, and I graciously answered.

11 thoughts on “Ask the AB: How to Tip Your Waitress”

  1. Thanks AB. My mom was a breakfast waitress at a diner. She was often left a quarter. Depressing. TIP THE WAITSTAFF!

  2. if you tip them on plastic, they have to wait to get the tip till the batch of cards has been run through. so yeah, tip cash, cause the batch gets run though only once a day, and if they work friday they don’t get the money till end of shift monday. if they work monday. if not, their next work day. sucky system indeed. what brings this up, dear ab?

  3. That’s exactly my move – 20, unless it’s more. I was a waiter for five years, and I thought then and now that everyone who wants to eat out should be forced to engage in a mandatory waiter/waitress boot camp period… Being served is a privilege, not a right.

  4. 1. Right on!
    2. At LEAST 20!
    3. Do people still drive Tercels?
    4. A lb. of weed – must be the side bidness.
    5. I hear that the rich MFers don’t tip and that’s why they own us.
    6. Enjoy your meal.

  5. Hey thanks, Ames!

    A few other points of interest, since you brought it up…

    Those who require the most attention/service always tip the least. Sad, but true. I have a lot of theories about why this is, but it is a Natural Law of Service you just can’t fight. In relation to this, I will also never understand why a parent will allow their kids to run around (it’s NOT safe to do in a restaurant, EVER), make crazy messes I’m sure the kid gets in trouble for doing at home, and be rude to the waitstaff and then on top of that feel comfortable not tipping appropriately.

    Restaurant/bar service is a job many people are not cut out for. Yes, I am including some of the people who are currently employed in that area. Are there bad waiters, bartenders, bus staff? Absolutely. Any person in the industry will tell you that. Those of us who are great at what we do have to bear the burden of those who can’t keep up, just like in most jobs. This should make patrons realize that a) those of us who do this job well are SKILLED LABOR and b) when you have a great service experience, tip accordingly.

    The tip you leave doesn’t just go to your waiter/bartender. A large chunk of it goes to paying other employees as well: bussers, hosts, barbacks, food runners, etc. And most of the time, that tip percentage to the “support staff” does not change: it’s based on total sales. This works out great if you get great tips, and not so great if you get bad ones. It’s the nature of the beast, but a lot of diners aren’t aware of it.

    And, yeah, the paycheck thing: I haven’t seen a paycheck that didn’t say VOID on it in years. Don’t worry: we are taxed on our tips: I owe a LOT on April 15th every year. The 2.13/hr basically just goes straight to helping me pay taxes. I never see it. Which also means that when a waiter/bartender says they live on their tips, THEY LIVE ON THEIR TIPS. Also, that 2.13/hr minimum “tipped employee” wage has not changed in this state in a VERY long time…the federal minimum (non-tipped) wage has gone up many times over. The government assumes the base pay for tipped employees can stay the same because their tips are going up (because food costs have gone up), so naturally if people are tipping on the amount of their checks, the server/bartender is getting paid more. In theory. (I also buy my own health insurance and participate in my own retirement savings plan…most restaurants do no offer benefit programs, for many reasons.) Like Blanche Dubois, we service industry folk really do “depend on the kindness of strangers”.

    All that being said, I actually do enjoy what I do. I love the social aspect of it. I love the odd hours. I love turning people onto really good food or drinks out of their comfort zone. I love that it’s a very physical job. I love that many aspects of this job help support me as an artist. I love being respected for a job well done by being paid accordingly. I wish it happened for everyone in every job more often.

  6. Okay, so how much do you tip when you go to a place where you order at the counter and pay for your meal right there, get your own drink, and silverware, and refills, and such?

    Sometimes, someone brings you your food and cleans up after you, but sometimes, you clean up after yourself or even go back to the counter to pick up your own food.

    I’m all for tipping, and agree on the 20% for a regular restaurant, but these folks (in above place of employment) are not getting paid $2.13/hour….and they don’t come check on you, or even get you a drink…Still 20%?

    How much do you tip at a coffee shop, when you bring your own cup, and buy a $1.40 regular old coffee and then you put the cream and sugar in it yourself?

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